OUCH!

How did it get to be Monday already!?  And August for that matter?  Sheesh!  I guess time flies when you're having fun! :)

As predicted, my weekend was spent running and relaxing - my favorite.  Friday when I got off work, I headed out for a quick run - or so I thought.  I have been trying to make myself get to the gym lately to keep up with my core workouts and weights, both of which have been severely neglected in the month of July.  My gym is exactly 3 miles away from my house, so I decided to run there, do a few weights and then head home.  Right away though, in those first few steps my knees, both of the them!, were aching and had some pain.  I figured it would take a mile or so for them to warm up and then feel better so I kept plugging along.  Well, not so much.  Those three miles were awful, I was straight into the wind, it was HOT out and all I wanted to do was quit.  So I started bargaining with myself.  I decided that I would make it to the gym, do a couple of miles on the dreadmill then call my mom for a ride home. 

After a couple of miles on the dreadmill and a few hundred crunches I went to call my mom and no answer!  WTF?  She's always home!  I called her cell - no answer.  Called my sis - no answer.  And Ari was still stuck at work.  So, I sucked it up and had to run home.  The worst three miles of my life.  Thankfully the wind was at my back and I did manage to negative split! but really, I think that was due to the fact that I just wanted to get home!  By the time I got home I.was.done.  I actually tweeted that it was easily one of the worst runs I have ever had, easily in the top 5 worst, and continued to ask myself why the hell I do this!
8 miles - 1:05:30 - 8:11/mi pace

Saturday I wanted to run about 6 miles to meet my monthly goal of 170 but I knew that with my long run on Sunday that was probably not a good idea.  I forced myself to take a rest day in hopes that the day off would help me for the 16-18 I had on the books for the next day.  I was bummed I missed my monthly goal but was more worried about finishing on Sunday.

Sunday I woke up late!  Argh!  I wanted to get out early but I slept through my alarm!  I guess I was tired :(  By the time I got my butt out the door to tackle my long run, it was 10 am and I had no sherpa to go with me.  I had no real plan in my head of where to run but I was shooting for 18 and just headed out the door.  I went towards Almaden and hit up  a trail.  It was hot!  Why did I wait so long!  And...my knees were killing me.  Many times I thought of scraping the run, just turning around and heading home.  But for some reason, my crazy running brain kept putting one foot in front of the other.  The route I picked was also hilly...what was I thinking?  I passed a ton of peeps out walking and enjoying the sun and all I could think of was that I wish I was at home!  When I reached mile 8 I decided to turn around, no need to beat myself up more for a couple extra miles.  I had wanted to experiment with PB&J sammy's for my long run too, but with no sherpa with me, I had no idea of how to carry them.  My iFitness belt already had my phone and there was really no other place.  So I went with Sport Beans instead of Gu.  I did have to make a pit stop in the bushes at my turn around but other than that, my stomach tolerated the sport beans and thankfully I didn't have to deal with stomach issues on top of my screaming knees!

The whole way home I was envisioning me just sitting on the couch relaxing - it was my motivation to get home!  Those last couple of miles were just dreadful and I was doubting myself like crazy.  I honestly yesterday doubted I could ever run a marathon again, let alone BQ again.  I really wanted to run it at goal pace to see how my training is doing, but alas I finished with an overall pace of 8:22/mi - two seconds over what I would need for a BQ. 
16 miles  - 2:13:51 - 8:22/mi pace
Yes, it was a hilly route.  Yes, it was HOT.  Yes, I probably didn't fuel right.  Yes, it's probably not smart to try and run all your long run miles at goal pace.  And, yes, my knees are in bad shape.  But I'm sure we can all relate when a run goes bad, so does our thoughts.

I don't feel too terrible for not hitting the 18, or even hitting my goal of 170 for the month.  There will be more runs and months to hit my goals.  What I do worry about is my race in October, but I'm sure that is just more left over worries from how terrible the run went.  I do know, I have to figure out my knees.  I have a feeling it's my tight quads pulling on them, so I need to roll out more, stretch more and give myself an extra day of rest this week - all doable.

The aftermath of my run - double ice packs!

I'm signed up for a trail 10K race this weekend that has me excited, and I WILL tackle my long run on Saturday before the sun comes up.  I have learned my lesson, I have the sun burn to prove it!  And even with the rough start of July for me, I finished up with 163.4 miles for the month - not too shabby.  I went back and looked at what I have done for the year and I'm totally on pace to hit 1500 miles, maybe even more!  That made me happy :)

Just realized I rambled on and on about how terrible my runs were.  I hate that.  I run because it really does make me feel good.  I run because I love to eat.  I run because it makes me a better "me."  I'm so grateful that I have the legs and heart to do it, others aren't so fortunate and I need to suck it up and see the blessing that it is.  There are far too many other things in my life and this world to get worked up about - my running shouldn't be one.  Sometimes though, it just feels good to get it out.  But being able to move on is an art form in itself.

Sounds like you all had a great weekend of racing and running!  Especially TMB, Katie and Tara!  Way to rock it girlies!  I'm off to read all about them :)

Happy Monday and Happy Running peeps :)